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If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.

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A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
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Comedy Funny Humour Nickle Pocket
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
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Attitude Insult One Liner Remind Talk Time
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
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Admit Age Born Early Life
Go, and never darken my towels again.
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Angry Funny One Liner Towel
Room service? Send up a larger room.
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Funny Hotel Humour Room Service
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
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Dead Funny Man One Liner Stop Watch
I only write first editions.
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Attitude Edition One Liner Writing
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
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Finding Happiness Hard Time Healing Laugh
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
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Hear Memories Past Stop Story
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
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Army Justice Military Music One Liner
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
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Funny Leadership Man Women
Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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Fly Love Money Reality Truth
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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Humour Judge Jury Marriage One Liner
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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Funny Missing One Liner Women
If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
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Applesauce Cranberry Taste
I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
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Club Freedom Member

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