All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
GROUCHO MARXIf you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
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All geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARX -
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
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I intend to live forever, or die trying.
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I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
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I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
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Humour is reason gone mad.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
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I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
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Why, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
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I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
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Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
GROUCHO MARX