Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
GEORGE CARLINEveryone smiles in the same language.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Meow means woof in cat.
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Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
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There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
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The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
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I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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Don’t give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.
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Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
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When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot’s hands.
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There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
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People always tell me “Have a nice day.” Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?
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If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
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The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
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People can’t seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure.
GEORGE CARLIN







