If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
GEORGE CARLINPardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
GEORGE CARLIN -
A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is just mind control.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
GEORGE CARLIN -
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.
GEORGE CARLIN -
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
GEORGE CARLIN