People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
GEORGE CARLINSome people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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Always do whatever’s next.
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Don’t give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you’ll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
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Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
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With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
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If we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
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People always tell me “Have a nice day.” Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?
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The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
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Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
GEORGE CARLIN







