The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
GEORGE CARLINAlways do whatever’s next.
More George Carlin Quotes
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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
GEORGE CARLIN -
How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If your kid needs a role model and you ain’t it, you’re both fucked.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
GEORGE CARLIN







