If your kid needs a role model and you ain’t it, you’re both fucked.
GEORGE CARLINAlthough the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other’s picture.
More George Carlin Quotes
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There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
GEORGE CARLIN -
It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Meow means woof in cat.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
GEORGE CARLIN -
I don’t have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
GEORGE CARLIN







