We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.
GEORGE CARLINThe God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers.
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I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
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It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
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The God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
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Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?
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The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot.
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If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
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Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name.
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The safest place to be during an earthquake would be in a stationary store.
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I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
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Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
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Although the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other’s picture.
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I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
GEORGE CARLIN