black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I like to play in the low 70’s. If it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!

Bob Hope

For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn’t know they had a caddie division.
BOB HOPE

Caddies Division Fame Golf
America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE

Book Funny Reading
Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
BOB HOPE

Instant Laughter Vacation
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration
The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
BOB HOPE

Jesus News Pissed
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
BOB HOPE

Doors Even Garage Love Makin Next
Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn’t know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He’s always had an agent for that.
BOB HOPE

Agents Lying Typical
The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
BOB HOPE

Button Country Funny Hotel Humorous Maid Press Room Service
I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
BOB HOPE

Boxing Canvas Funny Sports
Eighty is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender. Or when you wake up as many times during the night as Burt Reynolds, but not for the same reason.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Night Reason Same
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE

Country Day Every Get Over People
I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
BOB HOPE

Although Beautiful Girl Lucky Over Thing Whole
Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
BOB HOPE

Anything Resist Temptation
He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE

Balls Go Golf Yards

I like to play in the low 70’s. If it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I like to play in the low 70’s. If it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Hope Quotes