The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
BOB HOPEThe help (in Japan) is very polite. They bow so much, you don’t know which end to talk to.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
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I saw more courage, more good humor in the face of discomfort, more love in an era of hate and more devotion to duty than could exist under tyranny.
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Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn’t know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He’s always had an agent for that.
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I don’t do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
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That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
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I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
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All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
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A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
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I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
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I led such a sheltered life I didn’t go out with girls until I was almost four.
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The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
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He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England
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My secret for staying young is good food, plenty of rest, and a makeup man with a spray gun.
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I only speak a little pigeon French. Just enough to get by with the little French pigeons.
BOB HOPE