I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’
BOB HOPEMy secret for staying young is good food, plenty of rest, and a makeup man with a spray gun.
More Bob Hope Quotes
-
-
You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.
BOB HOPE -
England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there.
BOB HOPE -
Bing Crosby and I weren’t the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other.
BOB HOPE -
Perfume acts as an anesthetic. By the time she floats a little your way, you’ll promise her anything.
BOB HOPE -
Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here – just for me.
BOB HOPE -
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
BOB HOPE -
The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
BOB HOPE -
There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
BOB HOPE -
On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag.
BOB HOPE -
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
BOB HOPE -
I just hope I don’t have to explain all the times I’ve used His name in vain when I get up there.
BOB HOPE -
That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
BOB HOPE -
I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
BOB HOPE -
She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
BOB HOPE -
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
BOB HOPE -
Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
BOB HOPE -
The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
BOB HOPE -
The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
BOB HOPE -
Titleist has offered me a big contract not to play its balls.
BOB HOPE -
There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
BOB HOPE -
He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
BOB HOPE -
At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides their press agents.
BOB HOPE -
I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPE -
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPE -
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
BOB HOPE -
Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPE