For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KINGAs life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
More Alan King Quotes
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
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Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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Modesty is not one of my virtues.
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My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
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One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
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When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, ‘You’re doing a Jewish act.’
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I won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
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It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
ALAN KING






