An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KINGEd Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
More Alan King Quotes
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That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
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There’s nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
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You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
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One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
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As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
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If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
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My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
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Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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I won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
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My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
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My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn’t let him cut my nails.
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Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
ALAN KING