Let’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
ALAN KINGEd Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
More Alan King Quotes
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
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Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
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Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
ALAN KING