And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
ALAN KINGOne thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
More Alan King Quotes
-
-
When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KING -
My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
ALAN KING -
It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
ALAN KING -
The other day my house caught fire.
ALAN KING -
One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
ALAN KING -
There’s nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
ALAN KING -
Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
ALAN KING -
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING -
Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
ALAN KING -
I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KING -
My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
ALAN KING -
If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
ALAN KING -
I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
ALAN KING -
Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
ALAN KING -
One thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
ALAN KING