I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
GROUCHO MARXWhile money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Time wounds all heels.
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Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
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Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
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If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
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Go, and never darken my towels again.
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Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
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Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
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If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
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A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
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Whatever it is, I’m against it.
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Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
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Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
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You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX