I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARXThose are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX -
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARX -
Room service? Send up a larger room.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX -
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX -
She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX