Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
GEORGE CARLINIf we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Religion is just mind control.
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Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.
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Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
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There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
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Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
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Always do whatever’s next.
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With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
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A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
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Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
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A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
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If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
GEORGE CARLIN