If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
GEORGE CARLINPeople who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
More George Carlin Quotes
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I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Meow means woof in cat.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Let a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Always do whatever’s next.
GEORGE CARLIN -
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is just mind control.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
GEORGE CARLIN -
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
GEORGE CARLIN