“Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.”

Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.

The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.

My books are water; those of the great geniuses is wine. Everybody drinks water.

Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

If voting made any difference they wouldn’t let us do it.

Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.

A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.

Loyalty to country always. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.

Empower us women and we will change this whole entire world.

Change is a natural form of progression.

If people don’t like me for whatever I do, for being me, then that’s too bad. I don’t want to change to be something that I’m not for other people to like me.

I’m under no illusion that there are things about me that I’d like to change. I just accept who I am, and I’m proud of it.

Some things change and some things never will. A night spent with an old friend, my heart is full.

The quality of one’s life depends on the quality of attention. Whatever you pay attention to will grow more important in your life. There is no limit to the kinds of changes that awareness can produce.

There is little sense in attempting to change external conditions, you must first change inner beliefs, then outer conditions will change accordingly.

You hear people say it all the time, how life changes so drastically. But you can’t possibly grasp how beautiful that is until you have your child.