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If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!

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I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
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Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
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Why, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
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Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
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I only write first editions.
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
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Go, and never darken my towels again.
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Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
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A very interesting theory makes no sense at all.
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If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
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A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
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