Its all in the mind, you know.
SPIKE MILLIGANIf I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
SPIKE MILLIGAN