My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGANI’m Irish. We think sideways.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
SPIKE MILLIGAN