It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGANIs there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
SPIKE MILLIGAN