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We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!

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Funny Planning Preparation Wrong

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Death Life Sick
Its all in the mind, you know.
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Mindset One Liner Yourself
If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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Death Himself Man
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Death Far Laughter Live Time
God made night, But man made darkness.
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Darkness Deep Invention Man Night One Liner Spiritual
How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Appearance Funny Myself Time
Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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Better Class Enemy Friendship Money Yourself
Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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Enough Food Politics
All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Chance Happiness Money Myself
I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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Beginning Book Funny Myself Poem Reading
I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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Myself Pain Stand Wake Up
Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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Animal Education Funny Start
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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Come Myself Quiet
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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Occasion Protection
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Blessing Deep Hard Time Light Perspective Philosophy
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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Country Enough Fools Funny People Politics Time Yourself

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