“We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.”

Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.

There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.

Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.

I’m a hero with coward’s legs.

It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t

I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)

And God said, ‘Let there be light’ and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.

I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.

Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.

Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.

Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.

In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.

Its all in the mind, you know.

I’m not a collector. I don’t like the toy cupboard syndrome that causes so many good cars to evaporate.

Wall Street is the only place that people drive to in a Rolls Royce to take advice from people who ride the subway.

Tesla is here to stay and keep fighting for the electric car revolution.

After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was; I just have fewer dents in my car.

They like, Savage, why you got a 12 car garage And you only got 6 cars?

You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.

Self-driving cars are the natural extension of active safety and obviously something we should do.

People will buy the car just because it’s a great car. We want them to think it’s excellent value for money and then, oh yeah, it happens to be electric.