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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Coward Hero Legs Myself
Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Class Expectation Morning Yourself
Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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Better Class Enemy Friendship Money Yourself
If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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Alive Kill Myself Promise Yourself
My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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Father Greatness Himself Inspirational Mad
We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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Funny Planning Preparation Wrong
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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Joke Laughter Myself Sing
I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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Myself Pain Stand Wake Up
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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Age Body Myself Time
How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Appearance Funny Myself Time
God made night, But man made darkness.
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Darkness Deep Invention Man Night One Liner Spiritual
I told you I was sick.
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Myself One Liner Sick
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Death Far Laughter Live Time
Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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Listening Myself Pain Talk
There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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Rain Sky
A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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Animal Worth

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