A lot of learning can be a little thing.
SPIKE MILLIGANI thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






