How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
SPIKE MILLIGANIts all in the mind, you know.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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I told you I was sick.
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
SPIKE MILLIGAN