I’m Irish. We think sideways.
SPIKE MILLIGANHer mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
SPIKE MILLIGAN