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The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

The constants all through the centuries will be the same; wine, women and song. Other than that, life will be very different technologically. In the year 3000 the universe will be expanding as it will forever, infinitely. We will probe outer space but never find life as evolutionized as ours
PHYLLIS DILLER

Constant Difference Other Same Song Technology Thought Wine Year
Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
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Chance Housework Kill Rake You
I have so many liver spots, I ought to come with a side of onions.
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Come Have May Live Onion Ought Side So Sport
Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.
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Any Argument Bank Been Cab Country Just Robbed Three Time
If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
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Beaten Before Him Husband Lick Mixer Want
I spent seven hours in a beauty shop… and that was for the estimate.
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Beuty Estimate Hour Seven Shop Spent
Do not taste food while you’re cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.
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Cook Food Lose May never Serve Taste
Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
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Christmas Everybody Forgotten Past Present Remember Time Want
My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.
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Brisk Excercise Good Idea Sit
I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing.
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Anybody Behind Doing Eighteen Iron Know Now Use Year
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
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Age Back Do Go More Than
The doctor looked my body over. I said: Is there any hope? He said: Yes. Reincarnation.
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Body Doctor Hope Look Reincarnation Said Yes
Every time I go near the stove, the dog howls.
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Dog Every Go Howl Near Stove Time
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
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Bed Fight Go never Stay Up
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
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Best Eat Getmrid Kitchen Odor Out Way
I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along – but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
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Along Always Easy Only Same Tell Understand

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