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The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.

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Best Contraceptive Nudity People

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I asked the waiter, ‘Is this milk fresh?’ He said, ‘Lady, three hours ago it was grass.’
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Ago Ask Fresh Grass Hour Lady Milk Said Three Waiter
If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
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Beaten Before Him Husband Lick Mixer Want
I was so wrinkled I could screw my hats on.
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Hat On Screw Wrinkle
When you play spin the bottle, if they don’t want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.
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Bottle Kiss Play Quater Spin Want
I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, ‘Take off your clothes’?
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Cloth Doctor Go Look Love Man Say Take
The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day.
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Common Day Husband Married Only Same Thing
His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.
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Finish Half Hour Last Minute
Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.
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Any Argument Bank Been Cab Country Just Robbed Three Time
If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, ‘Who could have done this? We have no enemies!’
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Come Enemy Geet House Mess Really Strange Win
You know you’re old if they have discontinued your blood type.
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Blood Discontinue Know Type
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
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Bachelor Guy Made Mistake Once Some
The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Bad Earn Ever Kid Last Lose Money Old Teeth Thing
You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
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Humble Keep Know Mirror
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
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Bd Commemorate Cook Country Kid Person Thanksgiving Through
I’m looking for a perfume to overpower men – I’m sick of karate.
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Karate Look Overpower Perfume Sick
There’s such a buildup of crud in my oven, there’s only room to bake a single cupcake.
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Bake Buildup Crud Cupcake Open Roo Single Such

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