Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARXA child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
GROUCHO MARX -
A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
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When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
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Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX -
I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
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Go, and never darken my towels again.
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Any place I hang my head is home.
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Room service? Send up a larger room.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX