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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.

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Cause Chief Divorce Marriage One Liner

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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX

Event Eyes Happiness Inspirational Morning Myself Power Present Unhappiness
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX

Cause Chief Divorce Marriage One Liner
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX

Attitude Insult One Liner Remind Talk Time
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX

Attitude Confidence
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
GROUCHO MARX

Doubt Interfere Marriage People Romance Sex Wife
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX

Lucky Person Pool Swimming Underwater
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX

Crazy Decent Life Meal Place Reality
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX

Human Nature Humour Important One Liner Speak
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
GROUCHO MARX

Finding Happiness Hard Time Healing Laugh
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX

Healing Inspirational Life One Liner Time Wound
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
GROUCHO MARX

Book Education Reading Television
I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
GROUCHO MARX

Funny Hero Heroine Tits
I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX

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A very interesting theory makes no sense at all.
GROUCHO MARX

Interesting Reality Sense Theory
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
GROUCHO MARX

Against Attitude
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
GROUCHO MARX

Man One Liner Success Victory Wife Woman

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