Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARXHere’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
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I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
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Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
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I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
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Go, and never darken my towels again.
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If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
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Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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I only write first editions.
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I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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All geniuses die young.
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Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX






