Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARXMost young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARXI was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARXIf you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARXWhile money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
GROUCHO MARXA man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARXEveryone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARXBlessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARXWhy, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARXI love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
GROUCHO MARXThe only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARXNo one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARXI intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARXIf you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
GROUCHO MARXTime flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARXAnything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
GROUCHO MARXJust give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
GROUCHO MARX