I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
GEORGE CARLINNever underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
More George Carlin Quotes
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If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
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Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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It’s important in life if you don’t give a shit. It can help you a lot.
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If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
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I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
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I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
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Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?
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Meow means woof in cat.
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There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
GEORGE CARLIN