Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name.
GEORGE CARLINThere are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
More George Carlin Quotes
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The God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
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Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
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People can’t seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure.
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Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
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Let a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
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The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
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Meow means woof in cat.
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Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
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The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
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Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
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The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
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The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
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How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
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With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
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A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you’re gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
GEORGE CARLIN