I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPETelevision. That’s where movies go when they die.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
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The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn’t got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
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I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
BOB HOPE -
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
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The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE -
The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
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I was there. I saw your sons and your husbands, your brothers and your sweethearts. I saw how they worked, played, fought, and lived. I saw some of them die.
BOB HOPE -
We’re on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It’s a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
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If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
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US President Gerald Ford’s golf was so bad we thought he was a ‘Hitman for the PGA!
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Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
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Contrary to what certain comedians have led you to believe, the national French pastime is picnicking.
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I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
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Timing is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
BOB HOPE