I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
BILL COSBYIn spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to discipline a child is still a mystery to most fathers and mothers Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.
More Bill Cosby Quotes
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Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
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Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
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I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!
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Old is always fifteen years from now.
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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
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Only stupid one’s.
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And so the dentist says ‘Rinse.’ So you lean over, and you’re lookin’ at this miniature toilet bowl.
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
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When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first?
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Mediocre people are the most dangerous people in the world.
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All parents experience the same problems.
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Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
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All Children Have Brain Damage!
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Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
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Suddenly, this romantic agony was enriched by a less romantic one: I had to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I couldn’t let her know about this urge, for great lovers never did such things. The answer to Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo? Was not In the men’s room, Julie.
BILL COSBY