Modesty is not one of my virtues.
ALAN KINGI won’t eat in a place that has suits of armor.
More Alan King Quotes
-
-
Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
ALAN KING -
That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
ALAN KING -
Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
ALAN KING -
I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KING -
My lawyer said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?” I said, “Fire and theft.” The lawyer frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.”
ALAN KING -
My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
ALAN KING -
Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or ‘stage’ Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.
ALAN KING -
I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
ALAN KING -
For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
ALAN KING -
Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
ALAN KING -
I always plan dinner first thing in the morning.
ALAN KING -
Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
ALAN KING -
The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
ALAN KING -
If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
ALAN KING -
An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KING