I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
GEORGE CARLINPardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
More George Carlin Quotes
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I’ve never owned a telescope, but it’s something I’m thinking of looking into.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Religion is just mind control.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
GEORGE CARLIN -
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
GEORGE CARLIN -
A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
GEORGE CARLIN -
It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
GEORGE CARLIN







