Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARXYou can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
-
-
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX -
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARX -
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARX -
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX -
We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX -
Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
GROUCHO MARX -
Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
GROUCHO MARX -
All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
GROUCHO MARX -
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX -
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARX -
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX -
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Humour is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX