Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
GROUCHO MARXPaying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX -
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
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Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
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When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
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Time wounds all heels.
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I only write first editions.
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I must admit, I was born at an early age.
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No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX






