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Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

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Age Beaty Eyesight Fade Like Look Marry May Own

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A passport picture is a photo of a man that he can laugh at without realizing that it looks exactly the way his friends see him.
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I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.
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I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet.
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Remember there is no way you can give the father custody of the children without getting a divorce.
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My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.
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Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Age Beaty Eyesight Fade Like Look Marry May Own
All mothers are working mothers.
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You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot.
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Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
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Next to gold and jewelry, health is the most important thing you can have.
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If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.
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I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.
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Admit Away Boyfriend Drive Forty Live Mile Sex Tremendous
Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
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Doctors say it’s okay to have sex after a heart attack, provided you close the ambulance door.
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Before you get married you should meet your fiance’s parents. It is not enough that you like his parole officer.
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Before Enough Fiance Get Marry Meet Officer Parent Parole
They just elected me Mis Phonograph Record of 1966. They discovered my measurements were 33 1/2, 45, 78!
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