I was a high school throw-out.
ALAN KINGI don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
More Alan King Quotes
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But in the movies, I just love the heavies. It’s much more fun.
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I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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Let’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
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As a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
ALAN KING -
Everything my mother made had to cook for 80 hours, and when she made matzoh balls she didn’t know fluffy. Everything sank.
ALAN KING -
Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
ALAN KING -
I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
ALAN KING -
Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
ALAN KING -
That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
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I always plan dinner first thing in the morning.
ALAN KING






