When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
ALAN KINGAn old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
More Alan King Quotes
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
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My lawyer said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?” I said, “Fire and theft.” The lawyer frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.”
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
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Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
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It’s more fun with someone who really likes it. I can’t imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
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I was a high school throw-out.
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I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
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You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
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But in the movies, I just love the heavies. It’s much more fun.
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I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
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An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KING -
I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KING