Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
GROUCHO MARXJust give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
GROUCHO MARX -
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
GROUCHO MARX -
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX -
I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
GROUCHO MARX -
I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
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Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX






