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I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

Steven Wright

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Discipline Funny Himself Person Time
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Break Up Imagination Myself Relationship
If Dracula can’t see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Hairs Himself Mirror Reflection See
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Difference Ideas Person Research Steal
If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren’t people from Holland called Holes?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Country Funny Nation People
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Mathematics Pronunciation Sound
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m six I’ll be ninety.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Age Anxiety Funny Myself Time
In my house there’s this light switch that doesn’t do anything. Every so often, I would flick it on and off just to check. Yesterday, I got a call from a woman in Germany. She said ‘cut it out’
STEVEN WRIGHT

Call Herself Home Light Myself Phone Woman
I like to reminisce with people I don’t know.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Myself People
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Memories Myself Past Thinking
There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Idiot Ocean Stand Wait
I am writing a book. So far I have the pages numbered.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Book Funny Myself Writing
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
STEVEN WRIGHT

Animal Evolution Monkey Science
When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child… eventually.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Children Myself Quick Toy
I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Car Funny Yourself
I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
STEVEN WRIGHT

Company Game Myself Thinking Wrong

I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

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I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

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