I’m not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
STEVE MARTINIt’s pain that changes our lives.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
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Always do business as if the person you’re doing business with is trying to screw you, because he probably is. And if he’s not, you can be pleasantly surprised.
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I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing.
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You have to get comfortable with your work, you really have to know what you’re doing, and it has to be almost boring to you to be able to do it well.
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When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.
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You can’t really conduct your life by one or two phrases.
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I have found that– just as in real life–imagination sometimes has to stand in for experience.
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
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Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!
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Some people have a way with words, and other people; oh, uh, not have way.
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How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
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Now let’s repeat the non-conformists’ oath: I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people say! Good!
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Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
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The greatest thing you can do is surprise yourself.
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Chaos in the midst of chaos isn’t funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
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There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
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It’s pain that changes our lives.
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
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Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
STEVE MARTIN