A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
SPIKE MILLIGANOnly on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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A lot of learning can be a little thing.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGAN