Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
SPIKE MILLIGANNever return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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A lot of learning can be a little thing.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
SPIKE MILLIGAN