Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
SPIKE MILLIGANNever return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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I told you I was sick.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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A lot of learning can be a little thing.
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
SPIKE MILLIGAN