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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.

Spike Milligan

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Country Enough Fools Funny People Politics Time Yourself
Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Children Dog Funny Rich
Its all in the mind, you know.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Mindset One Liner Yourself
And God said, ‘Let there be light’ and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Connection Funny God Himself Light Wait
My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Father Funny Himself Influence Mad
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Blessing Deep Hard Time Light Perspective Philosophy
My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Age Confusion Father Myself Name
I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Evidence Friendship Hands Myself
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Occasion Protection
Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Form Happiness Misery Money Yourself
Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Class Expectation Morning Yourself
My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Father Greatness Himself Inspirational Mad
This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Escape Eyes Loud Silence Work Yourself
Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Enough Food Politics
Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Death Myself Plant Return
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
SPIKE MILLIGAN

Come Myself Quiet

I’m a hero with coward’s legs.

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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.

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